Elusion
– The act of escaping.
– The act of continuously hiding.
"There was the focus of seeking pleasure, and the numbing effect
once they are finished, removing all specific thoughts from her brain.
It ushered in the solid, dreamless sleep that otherwise eluded her."
-Jhumpa Lahiri, The Lowland
Something made me look back to my own life and the things I have been
doing in the last couple of years. On scanning, I definitely could say
that this was the time when I spent most of it doing the things I wanted
to or living the way I wanted to. Some introspection and self-love
helped me discover my favorite things or the ones that brought me joy.
But some close observance, I felt that whatever I was doing, I kind of overdid it. In a way, I was keeping myself too busy.
I wondered when was the last time I just did nothing. It’s always
great to kill our time with the things we like doing. For me when not
working, it could be exploring a new place, reading/writing, or
listening to my favorite music or watching my kind of movies/Netflix
etc. But then I asked myself some questions:
Why can’t I just relax or rest for a while?
Do I need to slow down a little?
Why am I overdoing everything; too much travelling, too much reading…?
On doing some research, I was able to get to the two sides of the discussion here.
The first one throws light on the idle mind and says that if we are
idle it’s not only boring but leads to unhappiness. As we are humans who
can think and feel the need of keeping ourselves busy, unlike the
animals who mostly prefer to idle out their time and go around being
lazy. However the point is we can’t keep busy just for the sake of being
busy, but we need a reason, even if it’s a shaky one. Now that’s the
catch here: A reason
I found the second view of this topic more interesting. Any day when
we find ourselves not doing any of our favorite things we think that we
wasted our day or call it unproductive. Because having more of downtime
means we would be facing more of ourselves or our own lives which is not
that easy.
Am I comfortable with the feelings of boredom?
Why do I feel unworthy and unlovable unless I’m overachieving?
All these questions conclude to “Elusion“,
some kind of hiding that people tend to do. There is, of course, no
doubt that when we keep ourselves busy in the things we love, it brings
us sheer pleasure. It’s again correct that the time we spent doing the
passionate things is meaningful for us, but not most of the time. They
are easy means to hide and escape.
Our daily lives are nothing more than a long list of To-do lists
which never seems to end. At our workplaces, we keep on contemplating
with our targets, try to overachieve our boss’s expectations or at least
try to match up with them. Same thing goes with our personal lives. We
hardly can manage to save time to think about the day just passed on,
rather we are always brooding on how will be our next day or future. We
forget that we need to relax or we just don’t have to be “so busy” all
the time.
Author Brene in her book “Daring Greatly”, tells us to ask ourselves the following questions:
“Are my choices comforting and nourishing my spirit, or are
they temporary reprieves from vulnerability and difficult emotions
ultimately diminishing my spirit? Are my choices leading my
wholeheartedness, or do they leave me feeling empty and searching?”
Your take?
Some insights from
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